Fuel and Fuddle/ Pittsburgh

by Lauren Rara

It was a hot and unseasonable day; the heat brought out the half-naked Pitt girls in their way too tight Panther Paw shorts and t-shirts. Thankfully, the winter proved a stellar time for fake-baking, for otherwise I fear there would be a pasty situation on their hands. Regardless, it was a day that was too warm to cook indoors so, with a decisive curiosity, my girlfriend and I decided to try out Fuel and Fuddle. I was extremely excited about this place, one because my stomach yearned for something other than dorm food slop and two because I was anxious to try out my fake id. No, just kidding. (Maybe).

Anyhow, the dining space was small, but cozy. It kind of had this sports-bar-cum-brick-oven-pizzeria type feel to it, but when we were seated right in the middle of two other tables of overly excited Pitt boys, I was no longer impressed. Anyway, I think the best part about this whole restaurant is their beer selection. CRAZY beers. I mean stuff I’ve never heard of and could barely pronounce, let alone spell. And WOODCHUCK Draft cider. If you haven’t tried this, then do it. It’s delicious and comes in great flavors like Pear and Amber. Regardless, we got our beverages and then I saw the menu.

There’s a shit ton of greasy, deep-fried, dressed-up dishes with kitschy names but they’re all pretty basic. Burgers. Salads. Sandwiches. I wanted a healthy option, so I got something called “Veg Head Pasta” with Spinach and garlic over penne. My girl got a delightfully greasy dish called “Rollafatty” which is basically just a few honkin’ pepperoni rolls. Our waitress was pleasant enough, when she actually cared to see if we were doing okay and it took a damn while for the food to come. I think her little blonde head thought that if she catered to the students accompanied by parents she’d get a better tip. I recall almost throwing myself into the aisle to get her attention for another drink, but, alas, no luck. Anyway, food came and it looked like shit. I was actually sincerely disappointed.

Seriously. The noodles were so overdone that they were sticking together and the goopy “sautéed” spinach was gritty and unwashed. I took a taste of my girlfriend’s and that was delicious, though I think most of it was masked with the pounds of grease seeping off of it. I mean, beggars can’t be choosers, but if I’m paying close to ten bucks for a dish of pasta I want it to actually taste good and not like something I would in fact get on my meal plan.
Is it so hard to ask for quality healthy-ish food? The menu boasted its availability of vegetarian choices, but I honestly wish I would’ve gotten a pizza or something else. I feel like that’s about the only thing Fueling along that Fuddy-duddy of a joint.